I havn't been feeling very happy for the last few days, in fact I've had a minor depressive attack. I put on this great front to the world, but inside I'm dying...
I've been really worried about my daughter's future living arrangements. Not to go into too many details, but she has quite a severe learning disability, but we have done everything we can to encourage her to be able to live as independently as possible. Some hopes we (and she) had for the future are looking very dubious now, and it is a real worry. Plus I have been told that I must move year groups at work next year, and leave my darling infant children and department friends. I'm 'going up to the juniors'! I dont want to! So this has peed me off majorly too.
Plus (as if all this wasn't enough!) I am getting some menopausal symptoms which are really unpleasant, and its affecting my ability to sleep.
I was also on my own a lot this weeken as my o/h was working. And the weather is horrible!
So I have been feeling really low. I discovered that when I really feel bad like this that I have no coping strategies, nothing to turn to but my friend food! So I allowed myself to eat when I wasn't hungry, because I really couldn't think of any other way to comfort myself, and the feelings of pain were unbearable.
Not that the food takes the pain away of course, but it does dull it for a while.
So at least I am recognising what i am doing, even if I felt powerless to do anything else to comfort myself.
I'm a bit better today, I've been to work, and it's amazing how much better I feel as soon as I am around people.
5 comments:
I'm sorry to hear you're having a bad time.
I hope things start to look brighter for you all soon.
Well done for letting yourself use food when you need it, it's so great that you're at a place where you can recognise it for what it is, and hopefully not beat yourself up about it.
A
xx
It sounds as though you are having a really lousy time at the moment. When things get rough for me I use food to block stress, anxiety, anger or depression. I'm currently trying to deal with the bad times through other means, i.e. phoning and talking to a friend, making an effort to go out for the evening, i.e the trip to the cinema,renting and watching a good film, watching a favorite TV show that makes me laugh. The problem is that food is there and easily accessible, but I find if I distract myself with something else it lifts my mood for a while, and helps me look at problems in a different way. Good luck, hope things start to improve for you soon.
im glad you feeling better today the company in work can be a welcome relief, its great to see you recognising and accepting eating when you are not hungry as thebest way you know how to look after yourself sometimes
Ahhh doesn't it suck when life is uncertain and changes occur that we did not plan for.
I hope all turns out for you and your family.
Isn't it interesting how sometimes when we are down we try to avoid people when in reality being around people is what we need. i am glad you were able to find some uplifting with the people around you today.
Thanks everyone! You are all so sweet!
XXXX Alison.
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