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Wednesday, 3 October 2007

It's nearly a year since I started Beyond Chocolate, since I attended the workshop that is. It was really a turning point for me, and has given me an entirely new focus, as far as eating is concerned. I don't ever worry about dieting now, obviously my body weight and size is still a concern and I would like to be smaller.
But I have learned over the years, that dieting is not going to ever 'fix' this for me, and so that part of my life is finished. A lot of the 'disordered' eating that I did has also stopped, and this is greatly heartening for me. I used to be so distressed about the fact that I couldn't control myself in certain situations, and really hated myself for what I saw was my 'lack of control'. Of course what I now know is that I had extraordinary control over my food intake for quite lengthy periods of time, and that the 'disordered' phases of my eating were due to this strict regime that I took up at others. Funnily enough, now that I have 'legalised' a lot of my so called 'forbidden foods' I don't actually want them at all! In fact now I am not on a diet, I eat far less sweet stuff, and rubbish than I did when I was dieting. The chocolate bars (Swiss milk chocolate is my favourite at the moment) just sit in the cupboard for weeks on end, and I bought some Madeleines when I did my on-line shop (they looked so tempting) but I have eaten a couple of them, and really they are pretty tasteless and bland. So they will probably end up in the bin! I eat a lot of fruit) as per my last entry, and love salads, fish, white meat and veg.
Even my alcohol intake has gone down, as it sometimes makes me feel a bit grotty in the mornings, I found myself pouring my wineglass full into my husbands glass tonight, as I decided I didn't really fancy it after all.

The one area which I still feel I need to work on is the 'Move' principal. I just can't get motivated now I have started teaching in a new department at school. The hours are even longer, and I can't seem to find the time or energy.

1 comments:

Lesley said...

What do you do for fun and relaxation? Are there any sports you used to enjoy? Or would something like yoga or tia chi help you relax? Or even a swim and sauna? Anything like that you enjoy will be good and help recharge your batteries too. :)