Refreshed!

I have had a day in London at the Beyond Chocolate refresher course. It was a bit of a nightmare getting there, as the local train company decided to use this weekend to close half of the line, and put buses on instead. I got there in the end, but the home journey took a long time, and I didn't get home until 10 oclock. The day itself was wonderful, with a group of like minded women, and led by wonderful Sophie from BC. One of the bits I loved was where we painted this fantastic mural, I'm going to do something similar with my class at school.

It was also great to meet some of my online friends from the BC forum! Nice to put a face, and voice to a name!

A lot of food for thought in the day, and also food for the 'inner woman', we had a lovely lunch and chocolate treats, and were given a cute little egg timer (pink of course!)

I think I got a real boost from the day, it was very useful to go over the whole 'tuning in', process again, and also to be reminded about things like pausing, and the negative messages we tell ourselves the whole time.

I brought back some little pink gerbera daisies, and they are sitting in a little vase as I type.

Back to work!

I have had a good few days, eating wise, and have done a bit of walking too. I felt as if I had lost weight, but have resisted weighing myself, as I know this would be a bad thing!!!

I have had a bit of chocolate when I wanted it, have only had the white and raspberry chocolate so far, but it is very nice. I have decided to stop trying to like plain chocolate, as it really is too bitter for me, I will stick with good quality milk and white chocolate. My appetite is still low at the moment, but I have decided to live with it, I'm sure it will be swings and roundabouts.

I am supposed to be going on a Beyond Chocolate refresher Course at the weekend, which I am looking forward to.

It's been ok being back at work, nice to see friends, and the children again. I never discuss my eating issues at work, so it's nice to let off steam here!

Hunger? Where's it gone?

Well I have had a funny couple of days. Went out with Mum and Eleanor on Thursday which involved a lot of driving for me. I didn't have breakfast before I went out as I wasn't hungry. I was by the time I got round Mums after picking up E, but decided to wait until we had lunch, wich was fine. I had a lovely pizza, and some coke and a coffee which filled me up. I had some bread and a banana late evening. Yesterday I had breakfast around 10, toast and a banana, then decided I would have coffee and cake at Lakeside when I got hungry. Well I didn't get hungry, but decided around 2 that I was tired and needed a break, so had the coffee and cake anyway. Didn't feel hungry at dinner time, but decided to eat any way, and had chicken, pasta and veg.

Today I have waited until now (11.35 ish) and I am just beginning to feel hungry so will eat soon.

I just have to realise that I am like this, some days I don't feel very hungry at all, but if I need the comfort of eating something, then I can, as long as I recognise what I am doing.

It's a bit annoying because I bought some chocolate from Hotel Chocolat, but havn't felt hungry for it yet!

Valentine's Day

Just a normal day for me really as 0/h and myself really don't celebrate it that much, too commercial for us. But we will have a nice dinner and some wine, which I can enjoy without guilt now I'm off the dieting bandwagon. I have got quite a nice Chinese to have when he comes in, and I will eat as much as I want until I feel satisfied.

I had a good nights sleep after my pampering yesterday. I feel very chilled and relaxed, as I am off work for the week.

I am taking my Mum and daughter out shopping for the day tommorow, and we will probably have lunch out.

Pampering, Goddess Style.

I have had a pampering day today, I had a lovely Clarins facial, a pedicure, and had my nails done. Feeling very relaxed, and chilled as I am off work this week!

I have only eaten twice, as I was out around lunchtime; deliberately had my breakfast late.

I bought some treats from the new patisserie in town, and found that the chocolate mousse cake I had was a bit too sickly for me, I'll look for something a bit fruiter next time. It's that thing of eating what you 'think' you want again.

I'm feeling a bit resistant to doing pilates at the moment, I haven't really got into a routine with it yet. I might try again tommorow.

Monday

Well I think blogging must be harder than dieting, I had a hell of a job getting into this again today!

Quite a good day so far, one of the hardest things for me; is to eat slowly, years of rushing through my meals are hard to break. Also I think the bit I read in one of my books last week (Geneen Roth) about what you want to eat has really made me think. She says when you start on this type of programme (mindful eating, no forbidden foods) you eat a lot of sweet stuff, because of all the years of depriving yourself of them. After a while, apparently, you can begin to tell what you really want to eat rather than what you 'think' you want! (If that makes sense?)

So today I have eaten two slices of toast, one with butter, and one with jam.

Half of an M and S pasta salad, and a cream slice, have saved the other for o/h, normally I would have scoffed them both and hidden the evidence!

I feel comfortable now, about 4 on the hunger scale; 0 is starving, 10 is stuffed. (Another really useful tool)

Half term

I have a week off for half term, so I'm hoping this will be a good week. I want to do some exercise, and writing this will hopefully stop me from eating when I am not hungry.

No food is forbidden

Well here goes, my very first blog entry.

As the title suggests, this blog is going to deall with my issues around food and eating. I have a petty good record having been on or off a diet for most of my life. I have also been a slimming club leader, and recently attended a Beyond Chocolate workshop. The idea is to eat when you are hungry, and stop when you are satisfied.
Mindful eating is what i am trying to acheive, so that I am 'present' while I eat, and thus do not overeat(!)
Geneen Roth's books have also been an inspiration